THE BIG WORLD TRIP

What we've been doing ...

ORLANDO (& MIAMI)

ÝSat. 6 SeptÝ

Another late start, but we were all pretty whacked from the trip to and from LA and the attendant hassles with the car, so we didn't really mind. We also had a teensy bit of a problem prising the kids away from the pool, but it was pretty hot so we have to admit Ýthat we didn't try too hard.

After lunch we made one of our brilliant on-the-spot decisions and went to Gatorland, a wildlife park a few miles from the hotel in Kissimmee, which we had spotted on our way in. We got there pretty late and so were allowed in for half-price but it was still well worth it. The place was crammed with gators of all sizes, and the big ones were BIG, believe me, plus many other animals and birds. Lucas was especially fascinated with the rattlesnake.

We had a wander aroud for a while and then went to watch the Gator Wrestling Show, which was actually not nearly as crass as it sounds. One of the keepers hauled a "smallish" gator out of the moat surrounding the little arena -- no mean feat in itself, I can tell you -- and then gave a very witty, thouroughly enjoyable and informative show about how to handle an alligator and alligator behaviour.

At the end of the show -- having carefull taped the gator's mouth shut -- he then asked if anyone would like to have their photo taken sitting on the gator. To our absolute astonishment both Lucas and Amy jumped up shouting "Me! Me!" -- so we had no alternative but to fork out the cash. But was worth every penny just to see Lucas -- a kid who will run a mile from even a small dog -- sitting on the back of a real live alligator, with a grin a mile wide. They were SO proud of the photos and can't wait to show them to all their friends and family. On the way back to the hotel we had the added thrill of driving past Tupperware World Headquarters. (And no, it was not made of plastic., nor was it shaped like a lunch-box!)

That evening we availed ourselves of a little windfall, which I forgot to mention earlier. At LA Airport the kids got chatting to a really nice young lady who turned out to be from Orlando. As we talked further it transpired that she worked for the company that runs several restaurant chains including the Big Lobster seafood restaurants, and to our surprise she very kindly presented us with two Red Lobster gift cards worth $15 each. As it turned out there one one only a few minutes' drive from the hotel so we went down there and had a HUGE and really delicious seafood feast and it ended up costing us about $12. We regrettably could not remember the lady's name, which is a shame because we really wanted to send her a thank-you note for her kindness. It was one of the best meals we have had on the entire trip.

Sun. 7 Sept

The day my dream came true -- the trip to Kennedy Space Centre. Unfortunately the edge was taken off the start of the day beacuse we got completely lost -- Florida highway turnoffs are a nightmare -- and Averil and i had one of our classic travel fights. But eventually we found our way and made it there around 10am. On the way however we encountered another Florida peculiarity -- multiple tolls. On the road up to Canaveral there is one section where you have to pay three successive tolls within about five miles of each other -- the first 50 cents, then 75 cents, then 1 dollar. Talk about gouging! I thought Australian tollways were a ripoff!

Arriving at Kennedy Visitors' Centre, Lucas' eyes nearly popped out of his head when he saw the full-scale shuttle replica which has been erected out the front of the visitors' centre and it was a non-stop space joyride all the way from there. Our first task was the "NASA Up Close" Tour, which was a comprehensive bus tour to restricted areas including the (really incredibly huge) Vehicle Assembly Building, Launch Pads 39A and 39B and many other sights including the massive tractor crawlers which are used to carry the rockets out to the pads. We even got to see a wild alligator and a manatee (well its back, anyway) and the famous eagle's nest near the VAB, which has been there for over 30 years. The kids were a little bored in some parts but that was no major problem -- I was in heaven, and of course went berserk with the camera. The pictures will be of interest to maybe two other friends of mine, but it was a fantsatic experience to finally see this fabled place up close.

At the end of the tour the bus dropped us at the next and best stop, the SaturnV Museum, which contains a fully-restored Saturn V booster. Talk about awesome. You can't really appreciate just how immense these things are until you stand next to one, as the photo below -- us standing under the first stage engines -- will make obvious:

As you can see, you could easily stand two people my height inside one of the engine nozzles. We had a terrific time there loking at all the space equipment, including a real lunar module, and the special presentation room which includes the actual launch control consoles from the Apollo missions.

Finally Averil managed to prise me away from the Saturn V and we headed back to the Visitor Centre. There the dream almost turned to a nightmare -- after we got off the bus, I discovered that I had dropped my wallet --PANIC!!! -- but luckily the staff check the buses with a fine-tooth comb and it had been found and handed in. I didn't feel quite so stupid when I collected it, as there was a young German tourist there next to me, collecting his lost driver's licence!

After plundering the space store, we had a great stroll around the Rocket Park, which features a collection of most of the major booster rockets used in the US space program, and after taking several hundred more photos there we took a quick hike over to the Space Shuttle just before the centre closed.

One thing we discovered during the tour got us really excited -- it turned out that there was a military satellite launch scheduled for the very next day. We could not believe our luck and that would form part of our next little adventure ...

Mon. 8 Sept

Today it was Disney World, Phase I. I confess I was not in the best of moods and actually not feeling too well, and once again we got lost on the way, so that did little to improve the atmosphere. We had decided to do Magic Kingdom today -- for the kids of course -- and made another mistake by going to Fantasyland first. Amy later dubbed it "Screaming Baby Hell Land" How right she was!

It was HOT, it was crowded with families with tiny kids, the queues for the rides were long and mostly required standing out in the sun. I absolutely hated theÝ place on sight -- loathsome tacky sentimental kistchy rubbish -- and the rides were mostly pretty pathetic. What was I expecting, you ask? Something a bit better thank what we got, I must say. Call me an old grump but I thought it was a utter ripoff. The kids weren't terribly impressed either -- I have a classic shot somewhere of Amy on a merry-go-round, looking anything but merry.

Luckily Averil went on a reccy and came back to haul us over to Tomorrowland, which was far less crowded and much more fun. The kids had their photo taken with Buzz Lightyear and then we went on on the Space Mountain ride. We had not realised it was such a heavy-duty ride -- it was a serious roller coaster. Poor Amy was terrified out of her wits, and came off crying -- we felt awful! I confess I had my eyes closed for several of the bigger twists. But Lucas amazed us once again -- as soon as he got off he begged to go again, so I had to endure it once more, while he squealed with delight. After the second time he demanded "Again, again, I want to go again" but twice was enough for Daddy and Averil refused to go, so that was it.

It was very quiet for most of the rides in that section, no queues at all to speak of, so we got to do the Buzz Lightyear ride about five times and the kids loved it -- we had a good time too. But we couldn't help thinking what an absolute nightmare it must be in the peak season. The chicanes they had installed to manage the queues were huge, and you realised from that just how crowded it could get.

We spent most of the afternoon there before heading over to Adventureland. We did the Jungle River ride, which the kids loved -- Amy was wide-eyed through the whole thing -- and then a quick stroll through Frontierland, which was almost as tacky as Fantasyland. Yuk. I don't what it is about this really cheesy kind of entertainment that is so appealing to Americans, but they obviously lap it up. The other thing that really stood out was how outrageously commercialised the whole thing is -- there are sounveir stores and candy stores and food stalls along just about every inch of the pathways and everything is outrageously overpriced. Another notable feature was how many older single people and couples there were without children -- we had no idea why this would appeal to them, but it obviously did.

We left fairly early -- around 5pm -- because we had decided to drive down to Cocoa Beach to watch the launch. We stopped by the hotel then headed back towards Cape Canaveral and managed to get lost again, but eventually got our bearings and headed north towards Cape Canaveral. It was dark by the time we got near Cocoa and after missing the turnoff and nearly getting totally lost once more, we followed our noses and a few signs, made some educated guesses and made it to the vicinity of the beach. We drove along for a way and eventually spotted a road that looked like it led to the beach, and it did. And we had a fantastic view of the launch site. I dropped thAvvy and the kds there and scooted up the road to get some dinner, then came back.

There were already a few people gathered on the little walkway that led to the beach, so we started chatting to them. After a few minutes it dawned on me that I recognised the lady we were talking to -- then we both realised that she had been at Kennedy Space Centre the day before and had been standing right in front of us in the queue for the bus tour, chatting to the kids. I was astounded at the chance that we should run into her again -- Cocoa Beach is miles long and the likelihood of both of us going to the same spot at the same time was, well, dare I say ...Ý astronomical? (groan)

We waited for several hours hoping the launch would go ahead-- we had been told that the launch window was between 7pm and 11pm but they coudln't give a more precise time because it was a military launch. But, in the immortal words of Monty Python, "nothing happened". We waited and waited and waited 'til almost midnight but still no launch. Lucas was bitterly disappointed, but Amy was practically dropping in her tracks so we finally had to leave. I still have no idea if it was launched at all.

We had quite a pleasant time nevertheless and the kids were captivated by the phosphoresence in the breaking waves, which was so bright you could see it from yards away up the beach. There were a couple of dozen people there by the time we left and the last we heard was that the launch had been delayed twice already, but how they were getting this info I have no idea.

Just before we headed off we saw some big boats, which we had assumed were military vessels, coming in towards the harbour mouth, just north of where we were. We were amused to discover that they were in fact casino boats -- they head off shore outside the territorial limit every evening so the passengers could gamble, since it's illegal in Florida.

Disney World Phase II - Epcot. We arrived fairly early and found it good in parts but rather dull overall. The "History of Civilisation" theme ride was really corny and wildly Anglocentric, of course -- hardly any mention of the 90 million brilliant things the Chinese invented. The 'Innovations' exhibit was basically a huge ad for AT&T and mostly pretty boring, although we were pleased to see that a couple of exhibits had been prepared by Questacon.

Lucas' favourite was the "Mission To Mars" space simulator ride, which is a quite powerful centrifuge affair -- one is locked into a mock-up space capsule and the ride is accompanied by computer generated graphics played on a screen which is lowered right in front of your face, so the overall effect is quite realistic. Space Commander Lucas rode that one four times, and would have happily ridden it all day. Amy had two turns and loved it too. Averil politely declined

The Kodak exhibit was pretty tawdry and mostly a huge ad for the company (surprise surprise) -- one is obliged to sit through a long nauseating cinema ad for Kodak before going into the main attraction, which was the very effective 3D short feature "Honey I Shrunk The Audience". That however proved to be great fun. It had the most amazing 3D effects, enhanced by some neat mechanical tricks. At one stage in the film, some mice escape from a container on screen and appear to run out into the theatre -- at which point hidden ticklers under the seats stroke the audience's legs. What a hoot! People were literally jumping out of their seats and squealing like crazy -- it was hilarious. The kids really enjoyed that one.

Perhaps the best part of Epcot was the HUGE aquarium, which makes the Sydney Aquarium look like a bath-tub. They masses of fish and some enormous things -- tuna, dolphins, sharks, rays and even a special pool where they are studying manatees which have been rescued from the wild after injuries. There were also some great smaller tanks with jellyfish, sea horses and the like. it was very impressively set up and must have cost a bomb. We all had a great time there.

The kids obviously had fun, and I guess it was worth it in that respect ... then again, would it really have mattered if we hadn't gone there? I don't really care to think too hard about that one. On balance, I would not recommend Disney World unless you LOVE Disney (I don't, obviously) or unless for some weird reason you really get off on tacky, overpriced, crowded, noisy theme parks. Places like that are anathema to me at the best of times, and the cost (especially with the punishing exhange rates at the moment) was astronomical. The rides are all rather short, because they are obviously designed for pumping through thousands of people per hour. Ugh. As I ssaid earlier, it must be sheer hell in the high holiday season and I can't imagine how anyone would find that fun.

The grounds were beautifully kept -- almost too neat -- and everything was spotlessly clean of course, and I did note that they are evidently hiring more staff who are 'differently abled', which is good I suppose. But the Disney obsession with creating cheesy simulations of everything got a bit creepy after a while -- it all seems so infantile. I jsut can't fathom why anyone would want to build such things, let alone pay vast amounts of money to stand in long queues to see them. Oh well, you live and learn, but it was a darned expensive lesson ... *sigh*

After checking out we caught our shuttle to Orlando station to get the train down to Miami. The station itself was rather run down but also rather cool, a long Spanish style affair that had seen better days but definitely had a certain atmosphere about it. We checked our baggage in and went to the little cafe across the road, which turned out to be an unexpected delight. It's not in the greatest part of town by any means, but it was run by people who also had a gourmet catering business and their sandwiches were sensational -- they also gave them really funny punning names on the menu, which was cute. We bought some for lunch, figuring they'd probably be way better than the train food (we were right).

The ride down was fairly uneventful and the scenery not all that interesting -- houses, miles of palm and cypress swamp, etc. but it was a pleasant rest and a chance to catch up on our diaries and some homework for the kids. We arrived in Miami in the early evening and got a cab to our hotel. Boy is that station ever in a bad part of town -- the journey to the hotel (which was right near the airport) took us through some of the roughest, seediest, meanest looking, rundown slums I've ever seen in my life. Mean streets indeed. It was scary and we were very glad to get past that area.

The hotel was adequate and had a pool, so the kids were happy. After a swim we went across the road and had some seafood, which was a bit overcooked, but OK -- but as always with American food we got massive helpings. It's quite obscene how much food they give you -- no wonder they're all so fat! It's certainly value for money, but it's really just too much in many cases. Then it was off to bed in preparation for another early start on our way to Washington ...

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